Why sexual attraction is mostly about looks?

Your looks actually are way more important than most people think.

We have talked about that before in here.

Some pick up artists try to master on “game“. The art of seducing women and making them desire you sexually.

And they try to make men believe that women aren’t visual like men. They say things like women are totally emotional or women decide with their minds and ears not their eyes. And even an ugly, unattractive looking guy can make women highly sexually desire him with his confidence, masculine behaviors, social skills and status. These are the pillars of the game.

There might be some truth in this but most of it is wrong. It just doesn’t work that way in real life.

Real life, our biology, our brains don’t work that way.

I mean of course generally men are more visual and experience visual stimulation more intense and quicker than women do but it doesn’t mean that women aren’t visual at all.

Your looks matter a lot. And often times it’s even more important than your personality.

Here’s why…

Us humans, male or female we are in the same species. Most of the time we see and think the similar way.

And when you look at someone you make strong assumptions about his or her personality based on his or her looks.

Women or men we all think like this. It’s just the way it is.

A man’s masculine behaviors, his charisma, his social skills, intelligence and status can be sexually attractive to women. His confidence, his emotional toughness, dominance, his courage, ambition and assertiveness are all sexy traits. (That’s why i said sexual attraction is mostly about looks not all about looks.)

Because high amounts of testosterone makes a man more aggressive, dominant and assertive and therefore that might indicate quality genes that are able to survive in nature. Because assertive, dominant type of men are way more likely to survive in a wild environment and pass on their genes. And therefore women also look at men’s behaviors and manners to understand their true nature.

But the thing is and what i’m actually saying is that women and almost all people judge people’s personalities and behaviors based on their looks before even know them.

Therefore without having enough looks you can’t have success just with your masculine behaviors, social skills or status.

Because a person’s appearance is a strong indication for his/her genetic quality.

Our looks tell people how genetically superior we are. How healthy we are and who we are basically.

When it comes to sex which is all about transmitting quality, healthy genes; looks are incredibly, incredibly important. It is the most fundamental thing.

Therefore our looks not only affect our success with the opposite sex, it also affect our own personality, our success in life and the status that we will have in the eyes of society.

Study after study it has been shown that looks affect everything about your life.

Good looking men are always rated as more charismatic, confident, charming, funny, intelligent, social and successful. And when women see a handsome guy like that they feel attraction towards him, they get excited very quickly. After then his personality, his behaviors might matter but in matter fact many women even ignore bad personality traits of a good looking guy. Because they get highly influenced by his looks especially if the guy is really that much good looking.

Sexual attraction is mostly based on looks actually, it’s more important than masculine behaviors, social skills and status. They are important of course but they are secondary. These things make you more sexually attractive but only if you have a decent amount of looks already. If you don’t have enough looks, if you don’t look attractive enough then nothing works. It won’t.

Because you will not create that initial attraction. There will be no spark.

I mean look at social media. Look at average looking or unattractive looking male celebrities’ pages. Women don’t write sexy comments and go crazy for them as much as they do for handsome, good looking ones. If it was all about personality, behaviors and game and status we would see different things. We would live in a different reality. This actually shows how important looks to women even status can’t help it.

All studies tell us that women care about personality, behaviors and status only after they find the guy attractive physically. And even if a guy has a great personality women don’t choose him because of lack of physical attraction.

That means women don’t care much about your personality or behaviors if you don’t look attractive enough to them.

Even if women say they care about personality more than looks, even they say they always choose based on personality but when it comes to lust and sexual attraction they go for looks more than anything.

Oftentimes women care about personality more than looks when they seek long term partnership because at that time they look for compatibility, emotional connection and other traits such as resources. Or women value personality and status above looks when there are equally attractive men to choose from.

But many times women just lie about this to not look shallow and actually most of the time they are not even aware of themselves. They think they care about personality more than looks but their behaviors tell the opposite. They might try to convince themselves that they decide based on personality but they actually decide based on looks initially. They just aren’t aware of their own behaviors. They underestimate the importance of looks. Or if they are aware then they don’t say it to not look shallow. They are virtue signalling. When women talk about the personality traits that they desire they actually assume the guy is good looking already.

But many studies show that women care about looks even more than men do. Especially this is the case when it comes to sexual attraction. Especially when it comes to short term relationships.

But let’s make a thought experiment. Let’s imagine different type of guys and give them different personalities and see how we will think and react.

Let’s look at this guy.

When you see a guy like this (short, skinny, has soft feminine features), second you see him do you think that he is confident, masculine, assertive guy that has a lot of girls after him?

What do you think about him? What do you think about his personality?

If he states that he has sex frequently with a lot of pretty women would you believe him?

Most likely you wouldn’t. Because your mind would tell you the opposite. You would assume instinctively that he is some kind of virgin nerd who spends most of his time with playing video games and watching animes and he probably has very agreeable, sensitive personality. And you would think that he struggles with girls more than he succeeds.

If this guy tries to act confident and masculine, if he acts assertive or manly, if he tries to “game” women, would they buy his dominance? Would they buy his masculine, assertive behaviors? Would they really believe him?

This is why you can’t just act masculine or assertive, you can’t be charming without having an attractive, masculine looks.

Or look at this guy.

What would you think about him? Probably your first reaction would be “creepy”.

Would you think that the guy is charming, assertive and has great personality?

If you tell this guy you need to be more confident and assertive without improving his appearance would that advice work in real life?

As you can see, you can not separate personality from looks completely. They highly affect each other.

Let’s look at a different guy. When you look at this guy

or this guy,

what do you think? What do you assume about him?

If this guy states that he is insecure, sensitive, depressed, very agreeable guy who is virgin and no girl wants him. Would you believe him instantly? What would you assume?

You probably would think that he is highly confident, masculine, assertive guy who has a lot of women after him. You would think he is intelligent, charming, manly and successful.

And women think this way too.

They make strong assumptions about your personality and status before even they know you. Because you can not separate personality from looks completely. They go hand in hand.

If you look at the picture above you can understand this much more clearly. Same man gives you different vibe or “personality” just because of his looks. Guy on the left looks confident, masculine, passionate, successful while guy on the right looks creepy, weak, loser. Any behavior that guy on the left does will look charismatic or charming to women. And same behaviors will never do the same affect with the other one.

In conclusion, masculine behaviors and status alone won’t make you sexually attractive to women without having decent amount of attractive, masculine appearance.

This is how our minds work. And therefore just personality and status or money alone will never work and they don’t work if you don’t have enough amount of looks.

You don’t have to look like a male model of course like the ones above, you don’t have to look perfect but you just have to have decent looks enough to create that initial attraction and spark with women. You have to have enough amount of height, body frame and symmetrical, masculine facial features to make women attracted to you initially. After then your personality, your behaviors and status matter and play an important role.

You have to improve your looks like getting a good haircut, improving your style, going to gym and building your physique before even improving your personality.

Because no one can escape from halo effect. You can not succeed without having enough amount of attractive looks especially when it’s about sexual attraction and lust.

Often times women desire bad boys and masculine, assertive attitude that they have if they look attractive also. But if an unattractive guy behaves like that they get disgusted by him, they call him creepy or pervert.

Looks are incredibly important when it comes to sexual attraction.

Your height, your body frame like broad shoulders, having a healthy BMI, your face are all important generally.

When women see too short or very skinny guy who has small body frame they don’t assume he has confident, strong masculine personality. When women see an ugly looking guy who has unattractive facial features they don’t assume he is confident, charming or assertive. They don’t care about his personality or behaviors because they judge him instantly. They don’t find him interesting enough to evaluate his behaviors.

Women don’t find unattractive men interesting enough to be curious about their personalities.

When unattractive men act confident and assertive, when they try to use “game” on women, women don’t believe them, they think they are faking it. Oftentimes they get triggered and repulsed by their attitude. They call them “creepy”. Because they judge them instantly.

Because women and men, everyone judge people based on their looks. People can’t evaluate personality objectively without getting affected by looks.

Women rate men’s personality based on how good looking they are.

When a handsome man makes a joke or acts assertive or masculine it’s not the same thing with unattractive man making a joke. Women actually don’t desire funny men, they actually desire good looking men who are assertive and they think they are funny as hell. They think they desire them because they are funny.

Women can say “i like him, i desire him because he is funny or confident” but they actually get influenced by his looks not personality. Because women can’t be truly objective. Also as i said they don’t want to look shallow in the eyes of society.

Therefore sexual attraction is mostly tied to looks. Everyone actually know this instinctively.

Why do you think men try to hit the gym and wish they look more handsome, have chiselled jawline or they wish they look taller or stronger?

If you ask any man if he wants to look taller or stronger and have better looking face, what would he say?

Why do you think women are obsessed about their appearance?

Because deep down we all know looks matter.

When it comes to sexual attraction, looks are the factor more than anything.

(A tall, good looking guy has to be really really insecure, timid or effeminate to kill the sexual attraction. But if he acts even little bit masculine then he will be the sexiest man alive in women’s eyes.)

Some people can say money or status matter more than looks but as we concluded before money and status alone won’t make you sexually attractive to women. Most women use those rich but unattractive or average looking men and they exchange sex and their beauty with money, lifestyle and commitment to gain benefit for themselves. (They don’t even give proper sex most of the time.)

And many of those women cheat on their rich partners with handsome, attractive men.

If you are average or okay looking guy then improve your looks first with a decent style and by building your muscles. After then improve your personality, social skills and status.

After then work on your masculine behaviors and “bad boy attitude“.

And you don’t even have to be super assertive, hyper-masculine, aggressive type of guy.

Just not being timid, insecure, passive or overly nice is enough in many times.

Because your looks are more important, they are the major factor.