How people find their partners has really changed in the last decade. With countless online dating sites and apps people’ve got accessed many quality potential partners.
Especially for women, things are seems going pretty good. They have access to most handsome, quality men in their town and they’ve got massive amount of male attention that they never had before.
And data shows that. Roughly 15 to 20% percent of men only get attention from women in dating apps and most of that attention goes to top 1 to 2% of males actually.
This is a very depressing number for most men of course.
But why is it like this? Why don’t most women find most men attractive? This doesn’t seem how things happen in the real life. Of course women don’t find every men attractive but in real life they find way more men attractive than they do in online.
What’s going on here? Why do women find only very few men attractive in online dating sites or apps?
This is because how men and women are wired differently.
Men are 100% visual when it comes to valuing women’s attractiveness but women aren’t like that. Women also look at behavior and manners.
We have explained this before why this is like that. Why women care about behaviors and manners beside looks. You can check that article from here.
Simply what we said that women are wired to masculine behaviors in men beside looks and they are not visual exactly the way men are and they need motion and manners or context about a man before making decision about his sexual appeal.
Because men’s sexual value comes from his ability to survive, dominate and succeed in the world and masculine personality traits or behaviors are curcial to achieve that. That’s why women find masculine behaviors such as confidence and assertiveness or dominance really attractive sexually.
And this creates very big problem for most men. Even a guy looks decent and good enough still he can’t show his masculine, confident, assertive behaviors just in pictures and women aren’t wired to desire men just based on pictures. That’s why in online, only model looking, very handsome men achieve the most success. Because those men have all the perfect masculine facial and physical features. But rest of those men, like 99% of men aren’t that much handsome so women don’t find them much attractive.
This is why most women don’t find most men attractive in online apps.
If they knew those men, if they knew their personalities, how confident, assertive or masculine they are then they would find many of them actually attractive.
In real life this is how things work. In real life men can show their manners. Women can see their behaviors and how confident they are.
In pictures they simply can’t. That’s why for women valuing a guy’s attractiveness based on picture is just a very bad idea. Because women’s brain aren’t wired to that.
They need to see motion, they need context about men’s personalities.
Otherwise they will find only very good looking men attractive and they will not achieve success from online dating. Because those men can’t give attention to most women. They can only talk with one or two women at a time.
So that’s why online dating sucks and it’s much different than real life.
Of course looks is still important too. We’ve talked about that before and how you need to have decent enough looks to create initial attraction or otherwise your masculine personality or confidence will not work and how women will not care. This is truth.
In real life unattractive and ugly men are still having a hard time to attract women due to women care about looks very much.
But even a guy has a decent looks like if he is 7/10 on looks wise still he can have difficult time to attract girls in online dating apps because of this phenomenon that i’ve talked about.
Also note that we look way more different than we actually do in real life.
Camera lenses can distort reality and uglify your face. Also angle of light and how you pose are extremely important when it comes to taking a good photo.
8/10 guy can look 5/10 in a bad taken photo.
Therefore for most men, online dating is useless. They need to improve their social skills and personalities and go talk with women in real life and show their masculine personalites and their manners.
Because that’s how our biology programmed from the beginning.